Matt McAvoy Book Review

This is an incredible book, on many different levels, and an exceptionally important one – for the reader, for society but, more than anything, for the author.  Rebecca is a survivor in the rawest sense of the word; the sexual abuse she suffered for most of her childhood was depraved and devastating, and she gives her own account candidly and openly.  I’m sure the decision to write this book was many years in the making for her, and that the therapeutic value in doing so is a decisive next stage in her cathartic psychological self-actualization.  We get to share this journey of acceptance with her, and whilst extraordinarily harrowing, it is clearly of great import to Rebecca that she is listened to – the absence of which was a terrible enabling factor in the offences she suffered.  At this point, I should warn you that the depiction of her abuse in this book is detailed and graphic – indeed, at times so vivid that I admit I had to speed-read through some sections, and one in particular was a little too much for me.  But, for the sake of Rebecca, her bravery and the necessity to hear her story, it needs to be endured.

But I don’t want to put you off – this book is excellent; superbly well-written, finely polished and top quality.  Rebecca is clearly a professional in her media field.  Even though she reaches rock bottom on more than one occasion, her life is an inspiring one.  In spite of the demons which haunt her relentlessly, and the “fragments” she has broken her internal persona into to cope with her trauma, she has managed to travel the world working in an impressive and envy-inducing creative career.  But it is clear that every life-changing decision she has made, and relationships she has been involved with, have been influenced by the monstrous events of her childhood – yet she continues on with recurrent optimism.  She talks of suicide at one point, as the social impact of COVID lockdown tears open and reveals the fragility of her mental health (she is, you tend to suspect, bipolar, with dissociation), but for the most part she looks forward to her next chapter in life.  Yet it becomes increasingly clear that the only way forward for her in life is to revisit the roots and creation of each and every one of the “voices” she has created, and the book delves inevitably deeper into her past to fix her future.

This is an inspiring book, written by a person doing everything in her power to be positive and stronger than her PTSD, and to make peace with the sadly common story that her abuser went entirely unpunished – quite an amazing woman fighting a formidable battle.  May this book (and hopefully its tremendous success) give her the therapeutic boost she needs on her journey.